Ever have a day that feels at moments like its a combination of deja'vu stirred up with what it must be like to be sleep walking - yet you know you are not? Don't know if that accurately describes what this day has been like for me but I don't know what really would anyway... lets just call it 'very weird' why don't we.
I have actually had moments of great clarity today - moments mind you - but they seem to cloud over almost as quickly as they came. And when it happens its almost as if there is a haze that almost has depth and color too just out of my peripheral vision. I think if I could really see it, it might be a blueish green, swirling in and around and settling almost like a light blanket around me... not necessarily touching me or on me but around me very closely.
I'm sitting here now with the tv on, Mr Pickles lounging on the couch, my hubs Todd in his chair eating a bowl of chili, and I somehow don't feel like I'm really even in the room.
I've tried to think on and consider several things of great importance today. In those moments of clarity I managed to settle a few immediate things and address them.
But the other hazy, cloudy, dreamlike moments far outweigh those, and have been so plentiful I almost question now that the clear moments actually existed :)
It's amazing how God has wired us, with protective measures built in, so that if we stay tuned into ourselves closely enough we can recognize the flags that raise themselves up to warn us. Yep, I think He's telling me to get some sleep, sleep that hasn't been plentiful or come easily lately.
So yes, I see the flag.
I think I will eat a bowl of chili next to Mr Pickles, talk with Hubs for a bit to reconnect from spending this day apart, read Jeremiah 32:40-41, then settle down for a long winters nap.